Congratulations, you’ve found our requirements.

First, we do not exist. You cannot contact us. You cannot join us. We do not want to be your friend. That said, we do have requirements should you truly want to be a part of this little movement we have going. Just remember, we do not exist and we will not acknowledge you if you find us in public.

Without further ado, here are the requirements you must meet to become a member of our non-existent society.

To call yourself a Plumbago, you must complete one task in every category.

PHYSICAL FITNESS

Caribou: Complete a 5k, 10k, Half Marathon, and Full Marathon in a single 12 month period

Gorilla: Benchpress 1.25 x bodyweight, Back Squat 2 x bodyweight, Deadlift 2.5 x bodyweight, Strict Overhead Press 0.5 x bodyweight

Chimpanzee: 15 pull-ups, 25 dips, 80 sit-ups, and 5 minute plank

Anaconda: Earn a bluebelt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu

Luchador and Certificate of Achievement: Complete two or more events above and earn a purple belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu

Education